Connecting With Others FAQ's

01. How Do I Find Friends Or My Soul Mate?
You’ve come to the right place. 1. Make sure your Profile is complete so that others will be able to find you by location or with keywords.  Click “Edit Profile” in the Login Box or under “My Stuff” or “My Profile”. There are three sections – “Required“, “Optional” and “Seeking Friends or Dating“.  Make sure to fill them all in. 2. Upload a good picture in your Profile! This is very important if you want people to respond! People want to have some idea of what you look like even just friends seeking friends. Some people may only check the Member Gallery.  You will want to be represented there. If you don’t know how to do it, send it to [email][/email] and I will do it for you. 3. Post to one of our Forums, either “Men Seeking Men” or “Women Seeking Women“. Put lots of information including age, location, whether or not you’d be willing to move for the right person, how important your faith is to you, whether you have or want children, your interests, hobbies, any mental or physical disabilities that might affect a relationship, etc. You can include contact information since this is a closed membership but I always recommend that you put your email address as code like “mary at christiangays dot com”. If and when you choose to Unsubscribe, all of your posts will be deleted so you don’t have to worry about old information hanging around. 4. Get involved in the List Serve. Send an email introducing yourself. It will go out to every other List Serve member. You never know who might be intrigued by your story and want to get to know you better. 5. Visit the Chat Rooms to get to know people in “real time”. 6. Be active! Login frequently so that you are listed at the beginning of “recently active”, send lots of Smilies, Compliments and Emails.
02. How Do I Find People Near Me?

There is a Basic Member Search box on the left side of the page with Location as one of the options.  Enter the Location you want and click the Search Button.

If you want to be more specific you can do a detailed Member Search and narrow your search down by province or state or even city.

If you want to narrow the search even more you can also select sexual identity and/or age range or even keyword. 

When searching you can use one, some, or all parameters.  Just remember that the more parameters you enter, the fewer the results you’ll get.

When you see the list of people click on the name and view the profile.  If it looks interesting, send them a private message. 

Remember that some people are willing to relocate, so even if you are not willing to move, you might find someone who will come to you.

03. Can I Trust That The People On This Website Are Who They Say They Are?

I have been dealing with frauds and scammers for 16 years on our old websites, (see list of those I have stopped at and in that time I have learned much.

This new website has been set up with many precautions in place, based on my previous experience.

First, we charge a very small fee to belong to Christian Gays (minimum $2/mo). We only accept PayPal for a reason. PayPal verifies that the person is who they say they are by depositing money in their bank account to set up an account with them. Therefore every member has been subject to PayPal’s vetting. This is the main reason we charge the fee.

Next, we have security software working 24/7 in the background.

a) It will automatically block a user’s IP address if they try to login without first being registered with us.

b) It will block a person’s IP if they try to login with the wrong username or password after a few attempts.

c) It will block a user’s IP if they are not registered but use Forgot Password link.

d) It blocks known spammers and frauds from even registering.

I am also notified of the IP address and country of every registration and login, so I know who is online and when.

We also have audio video chat. If there is any question of a person’s identity, you can always ask to see them “in person”, and of course if you have any concerns at all about a member, please write to me and I will investigate immediately.

I believe, without reservation, that Christian Gays is the safest website on the internet for people to meet each other.

04. How Do I Find A Specific Member?

There are several ways of finding specific members

 1.  Go to “Membersin the Secondary Menu


On this page you can Search for Members by Username in the Search box


or by “Last Active”, “Newly Registered” or “Alphabetical” 






2.  Go to “Scrolling Gallery” and view images.

People are listed according to how recently they have been active.  Click on the bars on the left or right sides or click on buttons to advance the images.

scrolling gallery navigation




3.  Go to “Member Search” where you can search by specific criteria.member-search

Read the instructions on that page to give the most effective search results.


05. How Do I Add Pictures To My Profile?


Note:  Everyone has 10 MB of space for your pictures.  A picture, sized for computer (not print), maximum of 600 pixels on the longest side, will usually be between 40 – 100 KB, depending on how much it is compressed/optimized.  That means you should be able to upload 100 – 200 pictures.  If you do not optimize them, you may only have room for half a dozen pictures.

You can size your images here.   Set Compression to 65 and resize photo to 600 pixels.  Click “Optimize Photo”.  Look at the optimized photo.  If it is clear, then you might try to increase compression.  If it is blurry, then you will want to decrease compression.

Now that your images are ready you can upload to your gallery.


1.  Go to DATING -> My Stuff -> My Profile.

2.  Click on Profile -> Gallery

3.  My Gallery -> Create a Gallery

4.  Name your Gallery and add a Description if you wish.  Click Create.

5.  Now you have a Gallery created, it is time to upload your pictures.  Select Upload.

To Edit your Title or Description, click on the My Gallery image or the Title of the Gallery.  This will bring up links as follows:



Click Edit and then Edit Details.